diary of pixie

dance it off, baby!

2010-09-10T16:34:00.000-07:00

I really love this DVD.. it's getting to be my favorite one. They use some pretty basic steps so I don't find it too hard, but it is if you've never danced before... they go at a fast pace so I would definitely recommend taking some dance classes in swing, jive, & quickstep before you attempt this. And you know how I love to swing jump and jive ;o)

Very fun and good workout, definitely worth having. I also got (but haven't tried yet) the Latin cardio dance that has merengue, cha-cha, samba, and.. mambo!

hey mambo, mambo Italiano...

a nasty affliction

2010-08-16T01:24:00.001-07:00

You know what I don't get? People who have this set nasty attitude towards others who happen to be really attractive, or really talented in a certain area. you know those types who automatically hate someone because they are more attractive than they are, or because they can sing or dance better than they can? That is just really lame. Maybe career-wise at times it's good to know what you're up against, but in reality that person is not at all responsible for how your life is turning out. Unchecked resentment is a nasty affliction which will wear away at your soul and hinder your progress. Accept and embrace your limits- everyone has them! Be happy with who you are and grateful for what you've accomplished so far. Focus on being the best YOU that you can be and everything else will fall into place.

harbor of my mind

2010-08-12T12:47:00.000-07:00

You may not come here anymore with your hard and abusive thoughts, with your plague ships of thoughts, with your slave ships of thougts - all these will be turned away. Likewise, any thoughts that are filled with angry or starving exiles, with malcontents and pamphleteers, mutineers and violent assassins, desperate prostitutes, pimps and seditious stowaways - you may not come here anymore, either.
Cannibalistic thoughts, for obvious reasons, will no longer be received. Even missionaries will be screened carefully, for sincerity. This is a peaceful harbor, the entryway to a fine and proud island that is only now beginning to cultivate tranquility. If you can abide by these new laws, my dear thoughts, then you are welcome in my mind - otherwise, I shall turn you all back toward the sea from whence you can.
That is my mission and it will never end.

One of my favorite passages from Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert.

Why...

2010-08-04T23:07:00.000-07:00

...do you get in trouble for blocking an exit when you're standing in the doorway? In case of an emergency, wouldn't you run out, too, therefore NOT blocking the exit?

Why does someone convicted of stealing do more time than someone convicted of assault and battery or attempted murder?

Why does the cat have to lay right in front of, or on the keyboard when I'm on the computer?

Why is there that little space inside strawberries, as if it was meant for a pit, and then the seeds are on the outside?

Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown?

Why are people allowed to put naked statues outside but we can't run outside naked?

Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?

Why are there black lines on a basketball?

Does it really count in court when an atheist is sworn in under oath using a Bible?

Why do people, such as S.W.A.T or Seals wear the bulletproof vests where you can see them? Wouldn’t people aim for their head or crotch?

Why can't we sneeze with our eyes open?

Why did Superman wear his briefs on the outside of his tights?

Why is the name of the phobia for the fear of long words Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia?

psychic

2010-08-01T13:31:00.000-07:00

I consider myself a pretty reasonable person. I am somewhat of a skeptic- scientific minded if you will - and like to have proof of things people claim to be true... because frankly, people talk bull all the time. However, there have been times where things have happened that I just can't explain.. and if I were to tell others about it, they'd think I was losing my sanity. Somewhere deep down I've always felt as if there was something more to life that we can visually see or mentally comprehend.. a sort of undercurrent of energy and signals. I tend to pick up on people's energy quickly, especially if I know them well. There have been times in my life in which I've just known things before they happened... like once before my sister and mom headed out to the store I told them not to go because something will happen. I just understood that it wasn't safe for me to go with them. They came back shortly after and announced they were in a minor accident. Some days before Sept. 11 I had a dream of a plane crashing into a tall building and a city full of explosions and smoke. I figured I had been watching too many "Independence Day" type movies and just had a crazy nightmare. Needless to say I had major deja-vu when I watched the events unfold on the morning of Sept. 11. The day my grandma passed away I was at an internet cafe and had a strong urge to go back to the apartment because I felt something was wrong.. when I got there, my parents were gone and left a note saying they had to go to the town my mom's relatives are in and that they would explain later. I knew someone had passed away. When I got a call from them a little while later, I found out it was my grandmother. There are times I've walked over to the phone and waited a minute or so for it to ring, because I knew someone was going to call me. It all wouldn't be so strange to me if it was never confirmed... but on the rare occasions these things happen, they are always confirmed. Why, though? Why do I tend to sense things before they happen? Is it because I am somewhat in tune with some emotional undercurrent where we are all connected, and subconsciously communicate? Is this a unique ability or something most everyone has experienced?

Lately I've been having some very vivid and interesting dreams so I've started reading some books by Sylvia Browne. Honestly I feel a bit relieved... and some things in her book really resonated with me. Maybe the microwave and phone beeping on their own isn't just my imagination... or being woken up between 3am and 6am lots of mornings from someone touching or saying something to me isn't my imagination either. Although I can't say I really believe in ghosts or spirits, I can't really say they don't exist either. I have never had the experience of actually seeing anything of the sort as some say they can. I am tempted, as suggested by Sylvia in her book, to leave an audiotape recording at night and see if I pick up any voices or sounds. Why not see if I can get some of my own actual proof that there is life after death when there are many others out there so certain of it? A part of me is a bit scared of what I might find... another part just wants a legitimate answer.

A Message from the Hopi Indians

2010-07-30T11:38:00.000-07:00

We have been telling people that this is the Eleventh Hour, now you must go back and tell them that This is the Hour.
And there are things to be considered:

Where are you living?
What are you doing?
What are your relationships?
Are you in right relation?
Where is your water?

Know your garden. It is time to speak your Truth. Create your community. Be good to each other.

And do not look outside yourself for the leader.
This could be a good time!

There is a river flowing now very fast. It is so great and so swift that there are those who will be afraid. They will try to hold onto the shore. They will feel they are being torn apart, and they will suffer greatly. Know the river has its destination.

The Elders say we must let go of the shore, push off into the middle of the river, keep our eyes open and our heads above water.
See who is in there with you and celebrate.

At this time in history, we are to take nothing personally, least of all, ourselves. For the moment that we do, our spiritual growth and journey, comes to a halt.

The time of the lone wolf is over. Gather yourselves!

Banish the word 'struggle' from your attitude and your vocabulary.

All that we do now must be done in a sacred manner and in celebration. We are the ones we have been waiting for.

~The Elders Oraibi, Arizona Hopi Nation~

the most interesting woman in the world

2010-07-28T13:48:00.000-07:00

She turns down 10 marriage proposals every minute.
She doesn't have to clean her apartment because it's already clean.
If she were to dial a disconnected number, it would still ring and be answered.
Her hair is stronger than titanium and smoother than silk.
When she flashes her smile, its brightness is seen by astronauts in space.
Her breath smells like perfume.
If she were to get pregnant, she would have others give birth for her.
She turned down a date with the Old Spice guy.
She has saved over a million acres of rainforest on her own.
If she were to run for president, she would be elected before she ran and serve 30 terms in office.
She can dismantle a nuclear bomb with a flutter of her eyelash.
She'll answer your question before you even ask it.

She is the most interesting woman in the world.

dating tips for women

2010-07-26T13:45:00.000-07:00

I see a lot of people make some very silly mistakes in dating and cause themselves unnecessary heartache and wonder why they are single or divorced. Well, listen up kids! Big sister has some advice for you... I came up with three main rules to remember while dating.
*warning - those not able to handle brutal honesty need not read ahead*

Rule #1: Know what you need & what you're looking for.

Know where you are in your life. If you're somewhere around 18 or in your early 20s, realize that you are too young to be fully aware of who you are as a woman just yet. Our brains (particularly the frontal lobe) aren't fully developed and mature until about age 25.. before then we are much more likely to take risks and make poor judgments. It's a time for you to learn and grow into a mature confident women who is ready for a relationship. By all means go out and have fun with guys you like, they will help you learn some important things about yourself and men in general.. but don't take it too seriously and try not to go too far. The chances he's thinking long-term at that age are very slim, and you, too, probably aren't ready to get that serious - after all, you have tons of college work and activities to focus on! Take your time.

If you're like me and in your late 20s and early 30s, you're in a prime spot to find and start a long-term relationship. By this time most of us have the experience of having dated a good number of men and have grown to know and really love who we are as a person. We have a better understanding of what we will and will not tolerate from people, and have a better grasp on how to make a relationship work. If you've never had a relationship, well then congratulations! You waited till the right time to start one. Get your hair and nails done, buy a cute summer dress, do things that make you feel like a fabulous femme fatal.. and get yourself out there! (just remember to keep the clothes classy and not skimpy.. keep your cards close to your vest and maintain some mystery)
By this time we have completed our education and have started a solid career.. we are able to stand on our own two feet. This is also a good time to get honest with ourselves and work on any past issues we might be harboring that prevent us from having healthy, long-term relationships.
You might not feel you even want anything long-term at the moment, and that's ok! Some people might not believe in marriage, or still have some hang-ups about commitment and need some more time to work through their issues. The first step is realizing that you have issues to work through. If you have problems with drinking and/or take drugs, and you want to eventually get (and STAY) married, then the first thing you need to do is focus on getting healthy and ditching the toxic substances.. and toxic people that might be in your life.
The same things apply if you're in your late 30s and over 40. At this time you're blessed with even more wisdom then your younger counterparts, and you can definitely use that to your advantage in choosing the right mate. Never think that you're too old to get married - I've read about people in their 60s and 70s getting married! We never lose our ability to love.

Rule #2: It's all about ATTITUDE.

If you have a cynical attitude and expect everything to end in disaster and not work out, well.. it won't work out. You just set yourself up for failure and don't seem to even want things to work out for you. Learn to applaud and root for yourself! Who's side are you on, anyway? Don't accept 'no' from that nagging little voice in your head.. Say to yourself and start to believe that YES, I am an awesome person capable of great relationships! YES, men want to be in relationships with me! And in the words of our president, YES I can! And never let anyone tell you otherwise.
If they do try to tell you otherwise, learn to be a bit of a bitch and stand up to anyone that disrespects you or brings you down with their own negativity. Make your boundaries clear that you have zero tolerance for any kind of abuse or disrespect. If they can't honor those boundaries, then they are someone that does not have the ability to be in any kind of relationship with you. The worst thing you can do is enable someone to be abusive.. you're not only doing yourself a disservice, but you're also doing the abuser a disservice by helping them stay in a self-destructive pattern instead of helping them get out of it. The best relationships are those where you bring out the best in each other, and inspire each other to grow and become better people.

Rule #3: Learn how attraction works for men.

And I'm not just talking about short-term lust.. I'm talking about natural and lasting attraction and intimacy. Men are very fascinating creatures who always stump us with the things they do. What better way to figure out men and what they need then to do research?
I think we can all agree that men are visual creatures - what gets their attention is a women's appearance. A beautiful pair of eyes and full bust can make a man witless... for the moment. A man who is a keeper (meaning ready and capable of a long-term relationship) will want to see what's behind those gorgeous eyes. Can you carry an intelligent conversation? Are you easygoing and flirty in a challenging way? Are you social and fun and exciting to be around? And once you're actually in a relationship, are you comfortable with your body and expressing yourself sexually? Can you connect with him emotionally in a way that gets him to open up?
Have an open mind and don't be afraid to ask the men you know what they find attractive, or what they think a women worth keeping is like. He'll admire your curiosity and probably thank you for asking! Also don't be afraid to read books on relationships or articles from dating coaches.. they are filled with valuable advice. Some books that I recommend are Why Men Love Bitches, Love Smart by Dr. Phil, Women Men Love-Women Men Leave, and He's Just Not That Into You.
As far as dating coaches go, I've found the following three very insightful:
Christian Carter
Rori Raye
David Wygant

Check it out and thank me later ;o)

PS: useful tip- Embrace technology! There are a bunch of dating websites (some free, some you have pay) out there where men are waiting to find a girl like you. Dr. Phil recommends Match.com, I also recommend plentyoffish.com. If you don't mind paying, give eHarmony.com a try.
There's also other sites tailored to specific categories such as jdate.com for those looking for other Jews, christiandatingforfree.com for Christians, etc. Being present online is a great way to expand your pool of options and allows you to quickly filter out those that aren't a good match for you. Of course when meeting someone online, remember safety first. Always have the initial meeting in a public place and never give anyone too much personal information like your address or social security number. Trust your instincts - if you have a bad feeling about someone, listen to the feeling and distance yourself from them. The ones you have a good feeling about - go ahead and meet them! They could turn out to be the real man you've been waiting for all along. ;o)

cat poop

2010-07-20T22:47:00.000-07:00

It's amazing what a nap will do.

Spent the night in Venice last night and slept terribly... it was loud, and too many cats up bothering you. Oh and did I mention that those cats barf and piss on the floor? Don't think I'll be doing the overnight thing there again..

I went to the City of Commerce today to get fingerprinted and finish my registration to work with LA County.. totally looking forward to finding out where I'll be working. I'm rooting for Olive View or USC Hospitals.

I had a nasty craving for a burger tonight, and since I listen to what my body tells me, I ate one. And yes, it was really good. It tends to be a monthly craving :p So much for vegetarianism.. though I'm not giving up vegetarian food, just not going to eat tons of meat.

Saturday night I had some awesome sushi on Universal Citywalk. We went to the park (which was PACKED btw) and saw the new King Kong 360 3D on the studio tour.. It was pretty awesome, though I'm a bit disappointed that they used a scene from the movie for it.. it would have been cooler if it was a new scene. Or maybe I'm just getting a bit bored of seeing the same things over and over at Universal? I might have to find a new theme park! hehe Though I will for sure eventually be doing Universal Orlando to see all the new Harry Potter stuff. Kind of missing Disneyland/California Adventure, might have to pay it a visit soon...

The Secret daily teaching

2010-07-19T09:20:00.000-07:00

Every night before you fall asleep, give heartfelt thanks for the wonderful day you just had (no matter what kind of day you had). Think about the next day, and intend that it is going to be wonderful. Intend that it is going to be the best day of your life. Intend that it is going to be filled with love and joy. Intend that all good is coming to you and everything is going to flow perfectly. Then when you wake up in the morning, BEFORE you get out of bed, again declare your intentions for the day and give deep thanks as though you have received them all. As you do this, you will begin to create your life deliberately, and you will experience firsthand the power that is within you to create the life you want.

stubborn heart

2010-07-18T04:25:00.001-07:00

Oh this stubborn heart of mine
will not give me peace
and not even with the passage of time
will it give release
each handsome new face
only provides temporary relief

Oh this stubborn heart of mine
has made a strong decision
It won't allow anyone to take your place
and fights your honor with precision

What's this worn out girl to do?
What's this tattered dame to pass,
when her heart dwells only on you?

tell me how to free myself
of this longing grip
tell me how to ease the pain
tell me why I trip

tell me you don't care for me
that you are happy where you are
tell me that you never miss me
and that it didn't leave a scar

don't let me be disillusioned
don't let me falsely hope
that you really love me
don't lead me by a rope

I wish I was like you
and able to move on easy
I wish I was like you
who makes it seem so breezy

falling into life

2010-07-17T00:02:00.000-07:00

I had a really strange dream last night, where I was with a group of people assembled around a hole. We were there to witness an event... a young girl falling into a kind of dark man hole in the ground. It was a bit of a scary experience for her, and I got a little freaked out, too, and wanted to catch her and keep her from going in, but it was something I was just there to watch and not interfere with. She kind of just dove in and screamed on her way down.. then I woke up. I felt like I had a strong connection with her, like she was on her way to my end and that I would see her soon.
I looked up what it meant to dream of a dark hole or tunnel, and apparently it represents the womb and birth. I think I witnessed someone's conception or birth... but who's? Is someone I know pregnant? I know it's not me... maybe I'm going to be an aunt ;o)

pop art

2010-07-16T15:16:00.000-07:00

break through

2010-07-12T22:10:00.000-07:00

"In life and in society, there will inevitably be hurdles or walls of various kinds that obstruct our way forward. In order to surmount them, we ourselves need to make great strides in our self-development. We need to become strong.

Speaking of the time of youth, with its many worries and problems, the Swiss philosopher Carl Hilty (1833-1909) suggested that young people adopt as their motto "Break through!" The thicker the wall of obstacles we face, the more we must summon forth our inner power and strength to break through it. This is precisely what the process of human revolution is all about." - Daisaku Ikeda

AMAZING Taiko drums, Long Beach- SGI Rock The Era Culture Festival 7/10/2010!

celebrate freedom

2010-07-04T13:31:00.000-07:00

chip awaaaaaaaaay!

2010-07-03T15:03:00.000-07:00

Drum Circle from James Boyd on Vimeo.

i'm not a bitch.. you just don't get it

2010-06-30T21:41:00.000-07:00

It has become clear to me in these past 5-10 years that men speak another language. I try to work with them and explain things to the best of my ability, but sometimes they just don't get it. Take for example a guy I met recently wile out in Santa Monica one night. Let's call him "Bill". My friend left to run to the restroom so I took her chair at the bar.. and there Bill was, sitting right next to me. We started talking, and he was cute and seemed pretty cool.. maybe a bit neurotic at times, but I just figured he was being weird and talking a lot because he was nervous. As the night progressed, he seemed to chill out a bit and I warmed up to him. He asked if he could call me sometime, but I didn't give him my number right away.. I asked him what he would do with it, and told him that I would only give it to him if he actually called me. Eventually we exchanged numbers before I left. We ended up texting and talking quite a few times. Initially he was nice, funny, attentive... but somehow there was something a bit off about him. In the beginning I tend to step back and observe what guys DO, and don't put much thought into what they say. They can butter you up and tell you everything you want to hear, but what really matters is their integrity and honesty - will they come through on what they say? Unfortunately, Bill blew it.
I've been around long enough to know when someone's messing with me and have developed an extremely low tolerance to lying. He kept saying he wanted to take me out, and I gave some suggestions to places and times, but we never ended up making official plans. Sorry, but if you want to be with me, you have to have the balls to call me and set a date for a specific place and time. There are plenty of men out there that have no trouble doing that, and I really don't want to waste my time with boys who have difficulty with such a simple task.
He asked me if I had facebook and wanted to add me.. so I said 'yeah, you can look me up by email'. I sent him my email, and when I asked for his he said he didn't have a facebook.. haha! and he said "sorry, I hope you don't think I'm lame".. No, I told him what's lame is his dishonesty. He for whatever reason has something to hide and doesn't want me seeing his profile. Ok, then you're disqualified buddy!! I told him I didn't want his email anymore and that I wasn't interested. He avoided making plans with me, he didn't want to open up and let me get to know him.. then he is either not looking/ready for a relationship (or maybe already in one) or simply just not into me. Yet he keeps calling me and wanting an explanation why I'm not interested, and thinks it's ridiculous that I would end it over facebook... He apparently wasn't listening to anything I wrote or told him.. I don't have time to deal with boys that mess with me. I'm a very honest open person, and if you can't be that way with me- then I can't be with you. I don't like to repeat myself.. I told him I wasn't interested 3 or 4 times and that I had made up my mind... it's taking a while for it to sink into his brain. Some people just don't get the meaning of the words "NO". I am done with Bill... and fortunately before either of us got too emotionally involved.

ready to rock

2010-06-30T17:45:00.000-07:00

Oh yes. This Friday night.. one of my favorites.......... Jane's Addiction!! ♥ Complete with a new bass player, Gun's and Roses' Duff McKagan. My most favorite guitarist has contests on his various social networking sites (twitter/facebook/blog) and I was one of the first 5 to respond so I was put on the guest list with a plus one. This isn't really a public concert, it's a promotional event for a summer concert series.. which means it's being videotaped so I guess we're supposed to look hot or something ;o)

so.. now what?

2010-06-30T17:24:00.000-07:00

And so it begins.. or continues I guess. I was laid off, so I went back to school to become a Pharmacy Tech. School is done. Completed my externship hours. Finally have my license and PTCB certification. Now comes the most tedious and treacherous part - finding a great job. I started playing super-recruiter for myself last week, updating my resume and applying to various different places (with the help from the ever-so-awesome Nina from Career Services at school). I have my sights on a possible job at an LA County facility... I'm taking a competency exam they need you to pass to work for them on Friday. Tomorrow I head to school to get my CPR card, diploma, and a transcript.. so I can send in an another application to work for the Veteran's Affairs Dept. My focus is primarily on these 2 possibilities because they are government jobs and offer great pay, benefits, vacation time, and sick leave.. no working on holidays either!

My unemployment has run out (because the government has decided not to allow another deadline extension), so something REALLY has to give in the next few weeks.

Zack

2010-06-14T22:58:00.000-07:00

Friday night I met a guy named Zack at Renee's in Santa Monica.. There seemed to be this enchanting vibe that drew us together and he's been on my mind a bit since then. He had a bit of this 'Chuck Bass' (from Gossip Girl) vibe. I found him super charming, sweet, and feel like he is a genuinely nice person. It was kind of an abrupt disconnect before I left the bar and didn't get to exchange numbers with him or anything. I strangely feel like we'll meet again somehow.. I feel oddly compelled to go out in Santa Monica again.
Also met a guy name John that was real cute and cool, but he hasn't been on my mind in the same way.

Who knows, maybe it's just the chocolate talking. It's an aphrodisiac you know ;)

Dating is fun

2009-07-31T23:07:00.000-07:00

It really is. I know a lot of people feel like it's a pain or hassle to get back in the game (especially after a tough breakup), but why not be open to meeting new people? Do you really have anything to lose? You can only really gain a great new relationship.
In the past few weeks I have discovered a great free dating site (changed over since my subscriptions have expired) and have been quite active on it. It's a nice reminder that there are plenty of guys out there that find me attractive. I have found a new confidence in myself, and have a lot clearer picture of the type of person that would be compatible with me in a relationship.
Even when I have gone on some dates where there was no spark, it was no big deal. He didn't call? So what! It hasn't discouraged me at all because I know I have hit it off with others who I'm still in contact with. I have the power to pick and choose who I'd like date. The key is recognizing if they feel the same way or not after meeting them or going on a few dates (guys aren't very direct about that usually) so you don't waste your time with someone that isn't interested... because you deserve someone that IS interested and appreciates you for the amazing human being you are!
I have dates with 2 different guys this weekend, and if I'm lucky one of them will keep sticking around :)

bummed out

2009-06-28T10:27:00.000-07:00

Ever have one of those days where you're just plain mad and annoyed?
Not at anyone in particular, just at life itself and how unfair it can be at times. I saw a movie last night that woke up this feeling in me.

I'm mad that cancer exists and causes people suffering and that they eventually lose their lives.

I'm mad that people fall in love and find someone amazing only to have that person pass away.

I'm mad that the love I once had didn't want to stay, and at breakups in general.

I'm mad that people's bodies are put in the ground to rot in a coffin once they pass away.

I'm mad that some people try so hard to help, but things never work out in their favor.

I'm just mad. And annoyed. And just bummed out about things.
Yes I know, this is temporary and in a few hours the feeling will pass.

2009 is time to sparkle and shine

2009-01-01T21:55:00.000-08:00

Dear 2008,

I hereby dub you my Year of Discovery. You get my 'Most Creative Year' award. All in all, it was a fortunate year for me - I finally have a nice stable job, made a bunch of new friends through my Buddhist practice, and discovered a new determination and confidence in myself that I didn't think I had. I have come a long way since high school, and am amazed at the amount of personal growth one can go through in 10 years. Overall I'm so much happier and have a much better sense of self. Try as they might, nobody can mess with me. ;o)

Hello and welcome 2009!
I hereby dub you my Year of Action.
My best friend and I were talking and she feels as though she's being lazy and not living to her full potential. I would never have thought that about her, as she's always taking action to be happy and improve. Then I did a little self reflection and wondered, 'am I living to my potential? Could I do better?" Well, yes. I can do better. I can stick to an exercise schedule. I can excel in school and complete a degree. I can become a diplomat and international agent of peace. I can be more outgoing and meet more people. I can date more. I can communicate with my friends and family more. I can go to check-ups at the doctor and dentist to keep myself healthy. I can take better care of me. So this year, I am determined to take the actions necessary to live the kind of life I want to live.

Let's do this!

Dear Senator Obama

2008-10-19T13:08:00.000-07:00

We are truly blessed to have you in the United States Senate. I commend your courage and dedication to create positive change for the people of our country. A true leader takes his hat off to the people and recognizes the potential in each person. It's about time such a person (yourself) has appeared. Your campaign has been consistent and wonderfully run. I have faith that when I vote for you on November 4th that you will stay true to the words in your speeches to the best of your ability. Thank you for emerging as a light to lead the way in the darkness.
You have a profound mission that is on its way to completion. Keep on trucking and never lose hope. May you and your family be protected from harm and may your political career brightly shine.

life has a funny way of helping you out

2008-10-05T16:14:00.000-07:00

This weekend has me feeling like the universe is totally messing with me. You know when you get frustrated because nothing seems to be going in your favor the way you want it? For me at the moment I'm referring to men. I am seriously amazed at what complete and utter morons they can be. Friday night I spent the night over at a friend's and we went out to a bar/lounge in Venice. All was cool and well until some guy standing near us wiped his friggen nose on my head or something. I was like "what the hell are you doing?" Then a bit later as I was walking by, some guy tried to knock the clip out of my hair. I turned around and was all "dude, what the hell?" And he came towards me as if to hug me so i pushed his hands away and walked off. I felt like I was on a playground at a grammar school where the boys pester and annoy the girls they like. I tried to dance on the dance floor but the guys were a little too touchy feely and annoying, until one guy, Robert, who just got back from the Marines, stepped in and fended off the creeps. Finally, I was able to dance normally with someone that respected my space. THAT is exactly what i'm looking for - someone that respects me and makes me feel safe.

The next day as we were heading to lunch, my sister calls and tells me she just talked to our parents and that my grandfather had passed away on wednesday. I spoke with my dad this morning and he said my grandpa was going to the store just down and accross the street from where he lives and my parents have their business. So my grandpa leaves his place and exits the front gate and walks down the street.. as he was crossing the street (somewhat jaywalking) a truck comes barreling down the road and hits him.. carries him like 30 meters, and stops right back in front of the gate. Nobody from my family was there at the time, but one of the neighbors heard something crazy outside and called my dad to come right away. They took my grandpa to the hospital where he was struggling for his life until the next morning when he officially passed away. I was thinking of staying over at my friends another night, but thought it best to be home and see my sister.
Death is a sad, but inevatable part of life.. and all I can do is remember my grandpa as the gentle sweet man he was, who would come and walk me home from elementary school in his house slippers. RIP Dragan Rujevic.. da ti sledeci zivot bude pun radosti, zdravlje, i milosti.

last night

2008-09-28T16:09:00.000-07:00

So last night I went to a Parrothead party. If you know who Jimmy Buffet is, you'll know the theme was margaritas, burgers, and parrot hats. One of the partners at work hosted it so i went with my friend Rachel and one of her newer pals, Jesse. After the party we went to a restaurant/bar in Venice. Rachel and I played foosball (table soccer) with these British guys - one of them who had this crazy curly blonde wig on. We got all into it and kicked their asses the first time, but had some trouble the second game because the blonde wig wearer entered the game and was a pro or something and it was really hard to get past him or block his shots.. even so, I would say we did awesome and showed the guys that we can hold our ground. I have to say I had fun hanging out with some real cool people.

Short Obama Poem

2008-09-28T02:24:00.000-07:00

The courageous lion takes the stage
steady and calm
carefully he speaks
like a ray of light out of the dark
he shines

oh the irony of life

2008-09-28T02:05:00.000-07:00

ok, what gives? Why is it that every time I come across a guy i really like, he's totally not interested, and the guys that totally have the hots for me I'm not interested in. Can we get a mutual thing going here or something? Looks like I have to step up my game and get some super hot clothes to crush the competition. ;)

Buddhist practice

2008-09-27T01:32:00.000-07:00

Earlier this year a friend of mine turned me on to Nichiren Buddhism, and I've been practicing ever since. One part of the practice is doing Gongyo in front of the Gohonzon.. gongyo is chanting, reciting 2 excerpts from the Lotus Sutra, and silent prayer. You can basically chant and pray for anything you like, although the best effect is when it has to do with your own or others inner transformation.
Some things I have been chanting/praying for:

*to have the courage to face and overcome my inner emotional and other external struggles.
*to change my negative karma (especially in terms of relationships)
*to be able to see through any past or present dilusions that could hinder the future of the relationship I have with the guy I'm dating.
*to be able to share the practice with those close to me.
*to have the strength to go on during difficult times.
*to never lose faith in a brighter tomorrow and to never lose hope that I will find the right person to spend the rest of my life with.
*to foster my compassionate Buddha nature.
*the health/happiness/safety of my family and friends.
*peace throughout the world and the happiness of all humanity

and so it begins

2008-09-26T00:15:00.000-07:00

Well hey, look at that. I am blogging again. Greetings to all that might be reading.

Right now I should be sleeping, but I had the sudden urge to set up a blog. I feel as though I have embarked on a new chapter in my life so I thought this would be a great way to document it. I know, i have to work on skinning it and making it look all pretty, but it'll do for now.

So i go to the Washington Mutual website to check my account and it says "Welcome to JP Morgan Chase." Fortunately nothing's really changed (other than the bank name and logo) and everything's still FDIC insured. As a bonus, I can use Chase ATMs fee-free now.

It is really interesting what is going on with the economy right now. It's a shame that congress is having a difficult time agreeing on what to do next.